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  • Title is parody of He's A Pirate from the Pirates of the Caribbean*

They say he come from a huge purple flying vehicle in the dead of the night. It was September 23 when he came and no-one saw his mischevious ways until it was too late. He had seemed like a normal skool-kid with a skin condition but Dib exposed him for the being he truly was; a hideous green alien with bug-like eyes that stared into you soul. The night he came he set up his base that was disguised as a green house with magenta-tinted windows and curious lawn decorations. One foot long gnomes gaurded his palace as a statue flag that read in questionable words, 'I love Earth'. He surely didn't love Earth. In fact he hated it. Several times he tried to conquer it but failed every time. Until one day. He had tried to smash us with Mars, give us all brain parasites, and flood us with a giant water balloon. Which sort of succeeded. His murder campaign was un-ending. Every chance he got he tried to destory us and life as we know it. Then, he had the brilliant plan. He was sure it would work as he was with the others. He conjured up a disease. One so deadly that he was positive it would wipe out the whole Earth. He needed to test it first though to see if it would work. So in a fit of rage at his robot he infected Gir with the disease and the robot was dead within a day. Satisfied and apathetic he decided to try one more test subject since a robot was not the same as a human. So he tried an innocent skool-child. No-one knew about him, no-one even acknowledged his presence besides Zim. He lured him to his base and as soon as he stepped foot on his base a gnome snatched him up and pricked him with a syringe filled with a purple substance. He fell weak to his knees, sick to his stomach, he head pounded and his heart raced. Zim felt the blood drip down his face as the human's heart exploded and the child's eyes grew still and it's lips silent. One down, he thought, billions more to go. ZIm produced his serum and after a year set loose a lesser extreme disease that he would "cure" with his invention. The government bought his serum and soon everyone had been vaccinated. The children died first as their immune system was the weakist. Then the adults died within a week. Quickly the population decreased as the death rate increased. Nothing was going to stop him now. Beside a yound teenage boy who had figured out the alien's plan long before the serum was released. He guessed the attack would come when a mysterious sickness swept over the town and soon the world so he delved deeper into the alien's database and found his master plan along with a death count. It was rising slowly as the disease spread but not as much as when the serum was released. He refused to be vaccinated and confronted the mad alien. Fighting and winning a long battle of blood, sweat and tears. Injured and dying, Zim took off. Never to be seen again. As for me. I'm a survivor and He's An Irken. 

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